Smile Like You Mean It.

I'm passive-agressive, I know it.
I haven't been posting because no one comments, few read.
I figured if no one would comment, i might as well not post.
Then i figured I needed this.
Yes, it's so bad, that i actually need something.
I've always prided myself (secretly) in not needing anything.
Then D made me freak out.
What happened (finally!) is we were texting. He seemed odd, and i asked why. He said that he did like me, but just as a friend. And, go fucking figure, he still liked my cuz A.
Bullet through my heart.
Not literally, obviously.

Lately (last 3 weeks? 2?) I've been a bitch and have been leading this guy on.
Imma tell him [soon] that i don't really like him.
All we did is snuggle a bit.
And text.
Alot.
I just don't have feelings for him.
I [almost] wish i did.

Today was bad (food wise) but the days before were good.
Real good.
No more driver's edd (classroom, i'll still have to drive with him...but not for like 2 weeks) so Imma get up early (9 a.m. is freakin' early when you don't sleep enough, just sayin') and go for a walk. I'm not sure how far. I may just do the long loop...3.5 miles...and then tomorrow night i'm doing this sandbag thing for like 4 1/2 hours...lots of lifting...i'm planning on skipping breakfast and just eating lunch...maybe get out of dinner? And i just got my friend M to agree to go with me (on the walk) so i definitely will not let myself get out of it :)

My body is so embaressing right now.
I'll post more, probably every day.
I don't care if no one reads these.

I Wear My Sunglasses At Night.

Sorry I haven't posted. Got caught the other day...literally about an hour after writing about how i can still be on. Ha. The Irony.
Eating Wise: Terrible.
Luckly i found some of my mom's old Slim Fast bars. I'm super happy, i found like 20, seriously.
But, go figure, my mom bought the wrong bread. Instead of buying more 40 cal., she bought like 80 cal. I can't eat that for breakfast. I'll ask her about it, but lately she's been asking me what I've been eating all the time. It's really pissing me off. I have to lie and say i ate a sandwich all the time, when i've only eaten 1 in like the past 2 months. Yeah. I don't like lieing. I feel bad. She should stop asking.

I'm not sure when I'll post again. I'm goona stop eating like a faty. My tummy's coming back. I hate it. It will be gone in a few days. It will be gone when school starts again (Mon.)