It Wasn't Me.

People annoy me, ya know? Ok, you don't, let me explain. So at lunch they had ham and cheese sandwhiches which i didn't wanna eat. I'd eat something else. I kindly offered it to my cousin A and then my kind-of friend M freaked. "Why aren't you eating it? Huh!" And then A started in. "Yeah, you've been giving us your food this whole week. (true) Why? Huh? You don't eat anymore. Going Ana are you? Huh!?!"

I got all defensive and wanted to cry. D tried to stick up for me and was like, "I've seen her eat. She's weird and only eats in patterns." Everyone looked at her and she continued. "Like, she doesn't eat during the day, but then she just eats everything in sight at night."

Part of me was mad, and i was like, "WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT! I eat ALL of the time! (at the time i was eating carrots) Remember last weekend! Huh!" everyone at my table was staring at me. But, go figure, i continued. "You call eating a big breakfast, lunch, ICE CREAM, dinner, and a ton of junk food at night NOT EATING!"

D said that that wasn't very much and everyone changed the sub. But honestly, i'm still mad. Sorry, D, but we can't all eat hundreds of calories per meal plus 3 snacks a day and still all be 107 pounds. Whatever.

Breakfast:
1 jello (10)
1 cup coffee (0)

Lunch:
1 2/3 cup lettuce (12)
Tiny meat cubes (7ish?)
Glazed carrots (75ish?)

Snack:
1 diet coke (0)

Total: 104.

Good day, so far. I think I'm goona eat some disgustingly fattening dinner with the fam. I don't even know if i can get out of it, I'll try tho.

Sorry for freakin' on ya'll. It just gets really frusterating, ya know? But i am kind of glad D tried to stand up for me. She and i had a convo about it last weekend. I said that it probably was as hurtful when everyone told her that she's too skinny (she DOES eat, she just doesn't gain weight. She's been trying!) as when they tell me I'm ana.

I've told you guys' this before. I'm not anorexic, ok? I'm sick of being called that. I restrict. I watch what i eat. I have to. But I'm not anorexic. I wish people would just not question my eating habits, it's none of their buisness's.